Self-worth and Identity
Losing touch with yourself
Have you spent so long adapting to other people’s needs that you struggle to recognise your now? Perhaps you second-guess yourself, apologise even when you’ve done nothing wrong, or look to others for reassurance before trusting your own instincts.
Our sense of self develops through our relationships and life experiences. When we’ve felt criticised, overlooked or expected to put others first, we can begin to doubt our worth, hide parts of ourselves or lose sight of what matters to us.
Perhaps you know that something doesn’t feel right, but struggle to explain why. You may find it difficult to express your needs, feel unsure of who you are, or wonder where you stopped feeling like yourself.
Therapy offers a space to explore how these patterns developed and what they mean to you today. Together, we can begin to make sense of your experiences, develop a kinder relationship with yourself and explore what it means to live in a way that feels more like your own.
Perhaps you recognise yourself in some of these experiences:
- You don’t trust yourself to make decisions.
- You question who you are.
- You often people-please.
- You find it difficult to express your needs.
- You have a strong inner critic.
- You strive for perfection.
- You feel disconnected from yourself.
- You feel as though you don’t truly belong.
How our sense of self develops
Our earliest sense of self develops in early childhood through interaction with the people and world around us.
They can shape what we believe we deserve, whether we feel safe expressing our needs and how we respond in relationships.
When we loose our sense of self, it is often through patterns developed in those relationships that made you start doubting your own beliefs and values.
How therapy can help you
- understand patterns
- reconnect with your needs
- trust your own judgment
- build self-compassion
- develop healthier boundaries
- feel more confident in who you are
- understand how relationships have shaped your identity
Self-worth and identity in young people
Many parents notice that their child or teenager has become less confident, more self-critical or withdrawn, or seems to be struggling to express how they are feeling. It can be difficult to know how best to support them or whether therapy might help.
Therapy for young people can provide a space to better understand themselves and begin accepting who they are. Growing up is a time of discovering who you are and that can sometimes feel confusing or overwhelming.
They might find it difficult to fit in with their peers, build lasting friendships, feel like they truly belong, or find themselves constantly comparing themselves with others on social media. They may also be feeling the pressure of exams, family changes or trying to meet the expectations of those around them.
As young people begin to trust themselves, their thoughts and their feelings, confidence can gradually grow. Over time, this can strengthen their self-esteem and help them develop a kinder, more compassionate relationship with themselves.
Frequently asked questions
Can childhood experiences affect my confidence?
Yes, our confidence often develops through our early relationships and experiences. If those experiences involved criticism, inconsistency or feeling unseen, they can influence how we see ourselves later in life. Therapy offers a space to explore these experiences with curiosity and compassion.
How long does therapy take?
There is no set time for therapy. Some people find what they need in a few sessions and some people take more time to reflect and build understanding. We will always discuss your needs throughout to make sure therapy is still the right thing for you.
Do you work with young people?
Yes, I work with young people and adults. Both in person in Eastbourne and online UK wide. You can read here more about psychotherapy for young people. And here for psychotherapy for adults.
How do I know if therapy is right for me?
If you are unsure, that’s completely understandable, many people feel uncertain before starting therapy. A free discovery call offers an opportunity to ask questions and decide whether working together feels right for you.
Next steps
If you’re wondering whether individual relationship psychotherapy, either online or in person in Eastbourne, feels like the right fit, you’re welcome to get in touch.
My location
Elm Grove Rooms, 6 Elm Grove, Eastbourne BN22 9NW
Contact me
Feel free to email me to find out more about counselling and availability.
Copyright 2026 © Evolving Sense Therapy
Make sense of yourself, make sense of your world. Individual relationship psychotherapy for adults and young people. Online across the UK and in Eastbourne.